uh yeah right......

yeah over the last few weeks i have been not me self completely! oh yeah i forget to say is !i have to remember being like this hurts myself as a person! i do not understand this at all! everyone keeps asking me the same question! so my response will not to you anything! i could only tell my best friends that know so much! including him but yeah for some reason when i want to try to tell him something he does want to speak to or too him!i do not know about this situation in my standard! if anyone i know mention about this i suddenly cry with tears! or say something worse like seven year failure or something else~! man i think i am being so pathetic wasting my time on this and just to give up!is just my will of doing anything is no more! is just when he said stop this ! i just was stuck and was so shocked ! those words really hurt me! is like he never known me anymore! i have this feeling in me that just want to rant about me and alot of things right now!

i think of everything! it all something i should never forget! but what he done to be me until now is such a pain to me! shuffling all of that in my face!now it just hurts to write all of this i want to somehow but if i say this out loud i cry with tears!